Discharged
She fell in the bathroom. She fractured her hip and her spine. She was rushed to a private hospital. She endured the pain for days. She was traumatised from the fall, from being on a hammock like stretcher to the emergency services, from being scolded at radiology for no cooperating and landing up in the orthopedic floor of this private hospital.
While all this was still being processed in her brain, she couldn’t believe what she was hearing when the assistant docotr said ‘ We have to ask you to be discharged because you assaulted our staff!’
She laughed because she thought the doctor was saying she could go home and then seeing the sombre and serious faces in the crowd of 8 people who had barged into her room , she realised something was wrong.
Apparently, what followed was 8 hours of emotionally draining torture for any patient.
Fifteen minutes ago, she was returning from her very difficult trip to the washroom in her walker, wheelchair, and high comode chair status and the care staff pushed her leg upwards only to give shooting pain in her hip fracture. And in response to the pain, she pushed the staff away with her hand. This was considered as ‘assualt’.
She exploded with emotions of fear, disgust, and most of all disbelief. And, her only verbal reaction was, ‘ Let’s leave! Since, these great people do not care to ask the patient what happened and seek clarity, what is the point?’
At which, a sensible lady from an Army background, requested her to calm down and narrate her version of the story. She couldn’t believe her situation and instead asked the lady staff to narrate hers since she was so sure that she had been assualted. As the girl narrated admidst fake tears, and sobs, she couldn’t believe her ears. Had she assaulted the girl? Or was she mahandled first by the staff? All in confused state as she felt her heart beat rising, her palms get sweaty, and her pain increase. She needed this to disappear but obviously it was happening to her shock and it wasn’t going away.
Her husband requested eveyrone to leave ther oom and continue the discussion outside since he could see that his wife was in tears in disbelief and shock. They all trooped outside in unison like a bunch of criminals having realized what had just happened was not right.
“Is this the right way to hold a discussion? Even if we have assaulted your staff, does it require 8 people in the room to pronounce her guilty?’ he asked. No response from any of them. Clearly, this was an awkward situation that they had gotten themselves in.
Upon dissecting the situation, they learnt that the staff had first mishandled her due to which she had pushed her away. Profusely apologising immediately after to the girl for doing so and sneidng her sister behind her to apologise again, she was flabbergasted at the turn of events.
As her treating doctor came to find out the details, she was again shocked to be hearing that she was alrgiht to be discharged home since she could then be on oral pain killers. That wasn’t what he had said last evening when asked how much longer she would have to be in the hospital! Talk about people changing colors to save their jobs. Clearly, he didn’t care if his patient was suffering from the trauma of the accusation, or the actual pain of the accident. He was obviously distancing from the issue. “It amazes me that the fact that your staff mishandled my legs and caused me pain is being missed out of the whole story isn’t it?’ she asked her doctor. ‘Isn’t patient well-being supposed to be your priority?’ Silence.
And then, ‘ I can’t guarantee that the staff will cooperate with you after this incident. So it’s best if you go on home.’ And, she felt her temper rise and heat pass into her forehead beginning an outburst. But, was it really worth it? Not really since here was a human being who was clearly not prioritising his patient’s well-being. How does one reason with that?
Many hours later, the troop came back to apologise to her for a misunderstanding and requested to move forward. She looked into the eyes of this lady who had been reasonable and decided to be mature about it.
Her heart was broken.
But, today, weeks after the incident, she cannot let it go. She can’t let go of her emotions of disgust and being falsely blamed for something that was clearly a situation of action/ reaction. She travels back to that moment multiple times in the day & feels the humiliation so often that it has become a pattern she regrets every time.
Something has changed forever. Something broke. Something died. She isn’t able to completely understand the emotions she feels. She is confused and concerned as to what extent this incident has changed her and if not for the worse. She is empty when she tries to understand what she feels. She isn’t able to describe it in words to herself or her husband. But, something’s gone & changed forever is what she knows.
Time may fade the memory but it seems the change, the emptiness, the humiliation, and the anger will be around for much longer.
Discharged a few days after the incident and home with her own thoughts. She knows that she will be physically fine over time, but the wounds of this traumatic experience will stay around for a long time.
